Precedent Setting Perceptions

Here’s a phrase that you often hear from leaders: “We have to be careful about setting precedents.” Interestingly, these comments are nearly always directed at what the leader perceives as “negative” precedents. Most recently, I’ve heard this phrase several times as companies are discussing whether they’re going to allow employees […]

Are You Willing to Know?

Most of us struggle in some way in our lives, and we often ask this question to ourselves: “Why do I do this?” The “this” is some behavior that you know is unhealthy or keeping you from what you desire, but you regularly repeat it. While we often ask this […]

What’s Your Microaggression Awareness?

Here’s one definition from Derald Wing Sue in the book Microaggressions in Everyday Life: “The constant and continuing reality of slights, insults, invalidations and indignities visited upon marginalized groups by well-intentioned, moral and decent family members, friends, neighbors, co-workers, students, teachers, clerks, waiters and waitresses, employers, health care professionals and […]

Tools for No … Keep It Clear and Simple

(from my soon-to-be-published book, Just One Step: The Journey to Your Unstoppable You) Last week I introduced you to the tools for saying no – tools to help you improve and accelerate your “no” muscle. These tools won’t eliminate the various challenges to the no, but they’ll help you navigate a world […]

Tools for No … The Pause

(from my soon-to-be-published book, Just One Step: The Journey to Your Unstoppable You) A couple of weeks ago I wrote about the challenges of no – that “yes” is easy and that boundaries (“no”) are hard. In response, I had several people tell me that it’s so true for them and […]

The Feedback Loop

In a world where the norm is to avoid feedback and everything that comes with it (the judgments and criticisms), conscious leaders genuinely and continually seek to know themselves better (for better or worse), so they invite and crave feedback. They seek feedback for the same reasons as others—it’s the […]

Beware Your First Answers

When it comes to asking questions of ourselves or about situations (often related to assessing risks), we need to be very aware of our first answer and even answers. The problem with our first answers is two-fold. First, our first answers (especially around risks or obstacles) are typically the biggest […]

Isolate the “But”

You know what I’m talking about … the infamous and dangerous word “but.” There are two versions of “but” that we love to use. First, is the “but” that virtually negates everything we said before it: I don’t want to complain, but … I don’t want to sound negative, but … I love your […]

They’re Your Buttons

Recently, someone asked me how they could prevent people from pushing their buttons. More specifically, they asked me “How can I choose not to react when people attempt to push my buttons?” It’s a great question and she asked me to write more about this, so here I am. The […]

Little Things Matter

Let me set the scene – I’m flying to Cleveland on a late flight (which was delayed), and I landed at Hopkins Airport at 12:30 AM. I had to be on-site with a client at 8:00 AM the next morning, and I still had to pick up my rental car, […]